Archie, the Helpful Dog
dbaylissThis story is easier to laugh about now. At the time, it very much was not.
About a year after moving to our new home in the country, we found ourselves missing the companionship of dogs. Then, one day, a very large dog began wandering through our yard. He kept coming back. No collar. No posted signs. No one is looking for him.
Eventually, I did what any sensible person would do.
I let him into the house.
He was big, soft, and impossibly friendly. Everyone took to him immediately. We assumed—perhaps optimistically—that someone had abandoned him because of his size. We named him Archie, and somehow, he became ours.
Archie and Erica
Archie was an incredible dog. From the start, he seemed instinctively drawn to Erica. He stayed close, watched her carefully, and acted like a self-appointed guardian. It was as though he understood she needed protecting.
Which brings us to the day Archie decided to be helpful.
Enter the Emergency Room
One afternoon, Archie took it upon himself to remove Erica’s G-tube.
For context: a G-tube (gastrostomy tube) is a surgically implanted feeding tube used for individuals who cannot swallow. It allowed Erica to receive nutrition and medication, either through a pump or by syringe. It was essential—and very much supposed to stay where it was.
Archie’s motivation remains unclear. Perhaps he thought it didn’t belong there. Perhaps he believed he was helping. Regardless, I suddenly had a six-year-old child with an open hole in her side, and it was seeping in ways no parent ever wants to see.
Michelle was not home. I called her immediately. Her response was simple and direct:
Go to the emergency room. I’ll meet you there.
A Memorable ER Visit
This marked our first visit to Gettysburg Hospital. Normally, Erica’s care was handled at Carroll County Hospital in Westminster, Maryland, or at Hershey Medical Center. This was new territory.
The ER doctor had a hard time believing my explanation. I assured him—truthfully—that the dog really had pulled the tube out.
Complicating matters further, the emergency room did not have a replacement G-tube.
Fortunately, we did.
Michelle returned home, retrieved one from our extensive supply collection, and brought it back. She then proceeded to show the ER doctor how to insert it.
That part is not an exaggeration.
Saying Goodbye to Archie
Archie was with us for about a year. Sadly, he was struck by a car after chasing a squirrel into the road and later died at the veterinarian’s office.
He was a big dog.
He was a well-meaning dog see.
And for better or worse, he left us with a story we will never forget.
The Dogs Who Shared Our Lives
Before Archie, we had three Shar-Pei dogs in Maryland:
- Pugsly was hit and killed by a car while we were in New Jersey.
- Smoochie was eventually rehomed after becoming aggressive following Pugsly’s loss.
- Sampson was returned to his original owner.
Each of them, in their own way, was part of our family—and part of Erica’s world.
Final Note
Life with Erica was often unpredictable. Even the most well-intentioned help could turn into an emergency. But these moments—chaotic, frightening, and later strangely funny—are part of the full picture.
This was life as it actually happened.
Sadly, a year after walking into Erica's life, Archie was struck by a car and later died in the Vet's office. The dumbass chased a squirrel into the road.
The Shar-Pei dogs we had in Maryland were sadly no longer with us for various reasons. Pugsly (left) was hit and killed by a car while in NJ, Smoochie (center) was given up because she became mean for some reason with the loss of Pugsly, and Sampson (left) was returned to his original owner.
